I cant stand it any longer... why do only sad things for the past repeat itself? Why must i go thru this torment one more time? was the previous one not enough? was do biased people still survive in this world? why is there so much unjust,unfairness and prejudice happening on/against me? I cant understand what I've done wrong... why? WHY? WHY? I know that God has a plan for me, like He used to have one for my previous torment... but why do i have to go thru this process over again? I guess perhaps God's plan for me is really beyond my comprehension. Argh no one would understand how I feel... No one would truly understand how much all these means to me... No one, there's no one...

I no things wun go my way, but why must it go in a totally opp way? torment, sadness, unfairness, unjust, prejudice, anger, wronged, biased, uncomprehendable, unexplainable... more than these words can describe the situation I'm currently in... Once again, I shall prove to all of you out there that you made the wrong step... I will prove you all wrong!



- dun wanna type my name >:(

Found this nice lyrics:)

別再為他流淚 梁靜茹

你走了太久一定很累　他錯了不該你來面對
離開他就好就算了心情很乾脆

他其實沒有那麼絕對 遠一點你就看出真偽離開
他不等於你的世界會崩潰
轉個彎你還能飛

就別再為他流淚　別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔　也不要太狼狽
他不值得你的淚　把那遺憾丟在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追　以後為自己醉。

每段感情都非常珍貴　他的好你就放在心扉
記得有個人曾讓你那樣的心碎

你笑了照亮夜幕的黑　什麼夢都不比你的美
多少年以後想起他還有些體會　那時你已無所謂


being quite random though :P

finally i get the full story... well at least i can now concentrate on growing and changing to become what God favours and of course doing His work:) Also, I can now concentrate on music and academics... :) well today was half and upset day bah... saddening facts I realised in band, so i have to chiong!!! jiayous! and well the other cant be said...but I am willing to sacrifice for the better of others and not myself. Sometimes we have to learn to give and not only take, in our lives... I guess I've got lots more to learn thru my whole life. Failures and disappoinments keep coming, more and more each time, but I've got to learn how to face it. Thank you Lord for being by my side guiding me all along... I wouldn't have been able to endure each fall without thee, Lord.

Sometimes it is better to have no very close fren then having close frens who give bad influence... dun worry I'm referring to none of you ppl I know, just a word of "wisdom" and randomness from me:P trying to survive each fall with a greater determination to stand up and move on:)


self motivating and emoing,
weirdo me ehs? tingli...

well life's tough, hurting pain...
have been reflecting, yet i think i have been wasting my time, lost my sem1 determination le so must motivate again... sians... and i am so missing my bunny... but also KOBE BRYANT CRAZE IS UP!!! YEAH!! haha kk end of post and i hate projects!!! :(



tingli:(

nth much... just so into kim hyun joong n bof n its songs and just changed seat... sitting with shaoyang now. Jie min infront of me, bev diagonally-right infront of me, calvin on the next column with leehwee n sexy with anyi infront of them:) well ofcourse no change... i m still at the last row? cool?! you r so wrong... i dun like lah! cant focus nor see clearly! disadvantage of being tall! well but sitting with shaoyang funny n lame but worst, he is a genius... kk end of post, hope the girls wun beat me up suddenly haha!!! :)


tingli:)

Well tomorrow's the day every band member has been waiting for... RHYTHM XXIII!!! Argh i m half looking forward n anticipating it yet half dreading for it to come...Like it is our last performance with Year 4s? saddedning truth... really hope that you all would stay... wouldnt want to see you all leave... cant imagine it too... haiz... getting emo liaos... writing notes now, just completed year4s... well cant get too emo, for there is still perc chalet! argh but really cant imagine perc without u all!!!!! The greatest memories we shared together practising for SYF is unforgettable... argh argh argh getting real emo! and oh no my piano parts are scrumbling down!!! die i might screw tomorrow's concert:(... all worried ... worried i would forget to bring smth... worried i would play the wrong thing n mr ng would notice, worried that i dun present myself well infront of the audiences and worried i might forget smth in the attire... haiz all worried now... but i no i shan't be so JIAYOUS PERKACHNG AND JIAYOUS BAND!!! :)


gtg le,
tingli:)

well feeling really sick n tired of all these... why do i come across all these hurts? making me distracted and I m losing my focus alr! haiz dun no how to cheer up... memories were meant to be beautiful but it ends up killing an innocent heart... sorry going into emotions quite alot now... dun no but just doesnt seem to find a lasting source of happiness... like it is all temporary. Everything, anything and everyone... nothing seems to last without change... i no i m getting really emo here but i really cant help it. But i no i must control... if not this will affect my studies!

"Lord may I pray to you to really help me overcome these obstacles... I hope that Lord you would give me the strength to stand up again after I fall, and Lord may you help me to gain focus in whatever I do and not get so troubled over emotional things. Like Lord you have mentioned, lay the affection on the the things above and not the things on the Earth, Lord help me obey your words... Lord I know that I have been leaving your words so Lord may I pray that you would be me once again back into your words and remain a true and real christian, not just one who claims to be a Christian...Dear Lord let me learn to love one another, Lord give me the knowledge and strength to be able to obey you commands and your words. May you Lord continue to guied me throughout my life. In Jesus's name I pray, Amen."

k end of post, really getting deep and serious thots these days... so sorry if you din like my posts but that is wat blogs are for--- to spill your feelings like in a diary... ( Btw, sorry wun change blogskin until free... cant b bothered to copy and paste and link all the ppl again...)


strengthless, sick and tired,
tingli